mosifer

2005-10-02T16:11:00.000-07:00

Some of you may already know this, but I'm a big idiot. It had been a while since I posted last, and I logged in to blog, and they asked me for all this crazy information and wanted to know how I wanted my background. I thought maybe they were just verifying that I am who I say I am, but as it turns out, I had just registered a new mosifer blog, and now have two.

I'm finally doing laundry today, after god knows how long, but I ran out of underwear, and my last clean pair of jeans were dirtied by a crazy South Korean who thinks he's Fred Astaire. This gave me the chance to watch Legend, starring Tom Cruise, which I am convinced is the best movie I have ever seen. Ever. Seriously, I don't know how it didn't win at least 12 Oscars. This brings my total number of cheesy movies for the week up to two, since I finally (FINALLY) watched the Goonies for the first time Thursday. I thought it was overrated, but at least now I get the "Hey you guys!" reference.

Stop Bothering Me, Here's an Update

2005-09-27T20:43:00.000-07:00

So I moved in to a new apartment, alone, which is great because I can eat lunch in my underwear while listening to cheesy music as loudly as I want to EVERY DAY. It's very small and very messy, but I love it.

Classes are alright this semester, but I'll give a quick run-through:

STAT 320: Statistics for the Social Science Major
Cake.

FSHS 400: Family and Consumer Economics
I think I took this class in high school, but I can't be sure, because I never really go.

FSHS 506: Middle Childhood and Adolescence
I love it. I love it so much I want to marry it. My instructor wears the coolest bow ties and gives bonus assignments after each exam. Also it's very interesting and it's no problem staying awake the entire lecture.

FSHS 550: The Family
Not nearly as cool as 506. Actually, not cool at all. No first name usage, no swearing, no fun. Also no learning. It's kind of like when you get cornered at a party by that drunk guy that wants to discuss social issues, only there's a facist attendance policy and halitosis involved.

I'm also trying to find a second job, one with experience relevant to my major, so I can put something halfway decent on my grad school applications. Or maybe, fuck that. I'll just go back to secondary education.

I'm going to volunteer with the Red Cross as a case manager for hurricane families, and I really think this is a good thing to do. I mean, up to this point I knew what was happening, and abstractly I was thinking how horrible it was, but never really knowing what I could actually do to make it better, besides donate some money at Dillon's and the odd hurricane relief effort. But it's really heartbreaking to see these people and hear their stories. I was talking with Chuck Smith, who's coordinating the volunteer program, and he was telling me that many people are enlisting in the military just because they see no other option. And there are people who have just lost everything. That aren't even going back to their homes because there is just no point. One family I met with yesterday was living on a rental property in Mississippi and the entire thing was just destroyed. Their home is gone, their jobs are gone, and they are just going to move in to Manhattan because there is nothing for them to go back to. And the mother doesn't want her children to go home because there are a lot of missing children and she thinks it would be better to start fresh than to go back to a place that holds so much horror. And, you know, you give someone a care package with shampoo and soap and frigging kleenex and it's like you've given them a thousand dollars. Because up to this point they've been using someone else's soap and kleenex and they're probably even wearing someone else's shoes because they just have nothing. Absolutely nothing. And the whole thing sucks.

The Pants

2005-04-12T22:42:00.000-07:00

Ever seen that Seinfeld episode where Jerry's girlfried wears the same dress on every date? Yeah, well I have, and now I'm living it. The same pair of jeans (bad jeans, by the way) have made an appearance five times in the past eight days, and I just don't think I want to deal with this. Of course, now I feel like I ought to keep seeing this guy, because I don't want to be the girl who stops seeing a guy because of his pants, but seriously. Either I'm going to have to tell him he needs new pants (and then he'll tell me I'm superficial, and want to stop seeing me, so problem solved) or I'll just have to stop calling him and make heavy use of the fuck-you button, or I could say "let's just be friends," which, while true in this case, is such an often-used line (especially with me) that it will seem like a cop-out.

But let me describe the pants. They're denim, with some crazy wash straight out of the nineties, and they're cargo. Cargo jeans. I believe the equivalent female choice would be leg warmers. The only thing that could possibly make these pants worse is if they zipped below the knee so as to be convertible into shorts should the weather change.

SHAPE improvements

2005-04-12T20:43:00.000-07:00

Today was the first annual(?) Peer Health Educators Conference at KU, and while it was not quite what I expected (and also not just about sex, contrary to popular belief) I still came away from it with some great ideas, although it could definetely use some development for the following years.

For a first-time effort it was pretty good, but it was lacking in structure and focus, which are pretty important things for a conference. The timetable was pretty vague, most groups weren't sure what exactly they needed to bring or to be prepared to discuss, there were some issues with parking, and a lot of the "discussions" were less discussions and more "listen to me talk about KU."

We got to the conference to discover that SHAPE was the only really developed peer education program there, and the rest of the people were from schools who had just implemented peer education programs or were looking to, and so SHAPE was treated sort of as a blueprint for a sucessful program, which nobody realized was going to happen, and we weren't quite prepared for. However, thanks to a photo CD, a powerpoint presentation, and some kick-ass ad lib from the group, we managed to pull off a pretty impressive presentation.

During the question-and-answer session, a lot of issues were brought up dealing with effective peer education, and while SHAPE is doing a lot of things well, it's quite clear that there is a lot we could do better. I think a good starting point for this do-things-better campaign is to train our first-semester SHAPErs a little better and a little sooner. The way the program works now, first-semester students do pretty much 100% classroom work for the first six to eight weeks. The book we work from is a little dry, to say the least, and while learning the facts and the bare bones of the program are undeniably important, I think it would be great to send out new students to observe presentations from the very beginning. That way, they can see how the presentations are scheduled, how they're done, and start to learn the works right off. Plus, it might combat discouragement when students come in expecting to jump in to the action right away and then study Red Cross manuals and look at infected genitals for two months.

One great program we're discussing as an idea for next semester is Healthy Willie Week as sort of a kick-off for the year (credit for the name goes to Lindsay Hicks, genius). We'll do presentations in the res halls and for the new greeks and blatanly plug SHAPE while also giving the kiddies free condoms, because after all, what's SHAPE without free condoms?

In the coming semester, we'll probably be bringing applications to all of our presentations, because I've observed that there's a lot of interest immediately after seeing the program, but when you don't have an app, and the student has to go get one, there tends to be a lack of follow-up. This way we might see more numbers and a larger selection pool for the following semesters group.

We also discussed sending some SHAPErs to Orlando in the fall for the national Peer Educators conference. SHAPE students have attended in the past, but they were usually third-semester students, so they got a lot of ideas, but didn't stay with the program long enough to implement them. This fall, we'll probably take one or two second-semester people and possibly one or two promising first-semesters, that way we'll hopefully see some of the great ideas they'll surely glean come to fruition.

All in all, I'm pretty fucking excited about new SHAPE ideas and developments, and a lot of the peers are too, which is just so cool. But not as cool as the free t-shirt I got.

Reckless Sex: Seriously Criminal?

2005-03-10T07:24:00.000-08:00

Surfing the net this morning, I came across an interesting article by Ian Ayres and Katharine Baker, professors of law and Yale and Chicago-Kent, respectively. This article was entitled "A Separate Crime of Reckless Sex" and attempts to "make progress on both the problems of sexually transmitted disease and acquaintance rape by proposing a new crime of reckless sexual conduct." A defendant would be guilty of reckless sexual conduct if, in a first sexual encounter with another individual, the defendant had sexual intercourse without using a condom. Proof of consent to unprotected intercourse would rest on the defendant, and if found guilty, the punishment would be a six-month prison term. Reason: "As an empirical matter, first-encounter unprotected sex greatly increases the epidemiological force of sexually transmitted disease and a substantial proportion of acquaintance rape occurs in unprotected first encounters. The new law, by increasing condom use and the quality of communication in first sexual encounters, can reduce the spread of sexually transmitted disease and decrease the incidence of acquaintance rape."

Notwithstanding my firm belief in first-encounter condom use or denying that rape is a heinous and disgusting act, this article got me thinking. At one point, Ayres and Baker state that a correlation has been established between uprotected sex and coercion, and therefore unprotected sex should be prosecuted. I find fault with this reasoning on a very basic level.

Correlation does not establish cause/effect. Because variable appears to rise when variable b does, we cannot conlude that a rise in variable b is causing a rise in variable a. To demostrate this, let's make variable a aspertame and variable b brain tumors. After the approval of aspertame sometime in the 80s and it's subsequent use in various food products, there seemed to be an increased incidents of brain tumors in the US population. Wolfcriers and alarmists would have us believe that aspertame was causing brain tumors (gasp!). Upon objective analysis of this claim, it was discovered that increased incidents of brain tumors was due to increased quality in the tools used to diagnose brain tumors, and had nothing to do with artificial sweetener. The two had a correlation but changes in variables a and b were entirely independent from each other.

More than a correlational study is needed to establish a cause/effect relationship. I think it absurd to establish a law prohibiting one thing that does not necessarily result in another, although it can be reasonably assumed that in some cases it may. In this case, as in so many others, sexual choices made by individuals are just that: choices. Made by individuals. Not fodder for bedroom legislation. As long as two adult individuals are consenting, there should be no crime.

Human relationships are perhaps the most variable thing in the universe, and attempting to establish regulatory legislation making all first sexual encounters adhere to a set of preset rules is not only unreasonable, I would go so far as to say that it is wrong. I would agrue that coercion by organization is worse than coercion by an individual, because the coerced has vastly inferior resources. This is a clear-cut case of compelling a person to do, or to abstain from doing, something by depriving the person of the exercise of his or her free will, particularly by use or threat of physical or moral force. The key here is the excersize of free will. The use of protection is a very individual choice and should be left entirely up to those involved. Yes, protection can prevent the spread of infection, but so can handwashing, and nobody's legistating public handwashing laws. Yes, many rapists don't use condoms, but I think it's a dangerous thing to begin to equate unsafe sexual contact with the enforcement thereof.

There's something to be said for computer literacy

2005-02-28T12:52:00.000-08:00

Well, all of the taunts from the Bunker cominbined with the fact that I clearly hadn't figured out italics on my last post like I thought I had has finally led me to the following conclusion: I am completely computer inept, and something must be done. Travis keeps telling me he'll teach me how to use a computer, but I've been resisting, since being taught how to use a computer seems a bit juvenile. However, since my skills don't even aproach the juvenile level, maybe that would be the best thing for all involved. So, please disregard any weird things the fonts might be doing, it's probably not intentional.

New updates regarding work and HN132: I won't be working in the Spanish department much longer. I'm going to go in for a few more afternoons to help Silvia finish some stuff up, and then I'm saying adios, trabajo, and taking my afternoons back. I won't be taking back tonight though, because I have to go to the grocery store and write down nutrition information for comparison purposes, since comparing similar products is a college-level endeavor. I went in the other day to do it, but they didn't have the right products in stock, so now I have to waste another chunk of time. If I hadn't been skipping class so much, this wouldn't be an issue, but I know I've lost points for not showing, so now I have to make them up. Grrrrr.

The Vagina Monologues

2005-02-28T10:03:00.000-08:00

I had an interesting discussion with Travis about The Vagina Monologues the other day, which sparked an interest in reading the book. After being unable to find it at Hale or the Manhattan Public Library, I requested an interlibrary loan, which is supposed to take two weeks. This morning I had some time to kill and went for a wander to the student union where I noticed several copies of The Vagina Monologues for sale in the union bookstore. One word: sold.

I must admit while reading the book I did wish I had someone to discuss it with, and since I was sitting alone in Justin at the time, my blog will have to be the lucky recipient of my wandering thoughts. Although I have not yet finished it, I do have some early-stage musings. I don't really like stream-of-conscious writing, and at some points I feel the book can best be described as an overcompensation, but I have found some of the essays to be quite enjoyable. However, I can't find myself - despite my feminist leanings - able to extoll its virtues or call it a "compelling rhapsody of the female essence."

Let me start with one issue I do take with the book. At one point Ensler makes the statement that she understands that women's discomfort with the vagina is merely an internalization of the outward discomfort that has been historically expressed by a patriarchal society. So, if one were to generalize this statement (and as generalization seems to be a trend in this particular brand of feminism, I'm assuming it to be acceptable) one could say that as a woman, my feelings about myself stem from my interpretation of the masculine viewpoint of my femininity. "I don't like myself because you don't like me" is a cop-out. It's an easy way of validating the criminalization of an entire gender.

Then, upon reading an essay later in the book, I found the following passage: "I never separate a woman from her vagina. It is who she is." Hmmm. Well, I am a woman, and I do have a vagina, but my vagina is certainly not who I am. Who I am, who any woman is, is a complicated combination of so many traits that embody real femininity, and to say that a woman is her vagina is, well, bullshit. Imagine the response to the male equivalent of The Vagina Monologues. "I'm a real man, and to prove it, I'm going to talk about my penis, and other mens penises, all the time. Men are penises." Well, actually, we would agree. We would call them a dick or a prick, an ignorant asshole, snub our noses and move on.

Turns out, that may not have been thirteen dollars wel spent.

Busywork, the second marker of a worthless class (the first being attendance points)

2005-02-13T12:10:00.000-08:00

Having arrived at work to find my boss MIA, I am searching relentlessly for something to do to fill up the time until she gets here and I can get started on whatever it is that caused her to call me in on a Sunday. My hope is that she'll only have a couple of hours worth of stuff to do, because already I'm mulling over the various homework assingments that could be better occupying my time.

This is the first semester when I have really had any homework that's time-consuming, and the class in which I will probably spend the most time on homework (busywork, really) is HN132. The thing that bothers me about this whole situation is that the class is ridiculously easy, and yet I have to devote so much time to jumping through hoops in order to pass it. I don't like busy work anyway, and I especially don't like it when it takes away from time that could otherwise be used in a valuable pursuit, like a nap. The project we're working on right now is a nutrition comparison of various fast-food joints. Doesn't sound too bad, until you look up the questions on the internet and discover that each answer requires that you search and compare information from several different sites. This means that each question takes between 3-10 minutes to answer. At 25 questions, that's 75 minutes minimum, with a potential for 250 minutes being wasted on what I feel is a ridiculous assignment. However, I got lazy last semester, and my GPA took a dive, so this semester I have to follow the ridiculous requirements so I can bring it back up.

On the plus side, it's fucking gorgeous outside today, so all you lovemongers should have a wonderful Valentine's day. Just remember to tip your sever well, so he or she can at least make some money on a day designed purely to remind him/her of his/her loveless status.

crazy

2005-02-11T11:07:00.000-08:00

Dude, my older sister used to date Matty Mulnar. That's fucked up. Image dating a guy that later decided to take vow of celibacy...

New Semester, New Style

2005-02-02T13:55:00.000-08:00

It's been a while since I've posted. This is partly due to business and partly due to apathy, but either way, I figured it was time for some updates.

True to form I have taken on a mountain of things at the beginning of the semester and am starting to feel a little squeezed. I don't know what I was thinking when I enrolled in an 8:30 class, but I know what I'm thinking now: don't do that again, dumbass. I've been running low on sleep and high on things to get accomplished, and as a consequence I've stopped cutting back on caffeine. I've also picked up a previously forsaken habit of frantically inhaling nicotene (sober).

I recently dyed my hair red (as I'm sure most everyone has seen by now) and I'm very pleased with the outcome. I'd been thinking about it for a while and then made the final decision on a whim when I was in Lawrence the other day with a huge chunk of time and nothing with which to fill it. I'll put a photo on my facebook as soon as I get around to it, so don't expect that anytime soon.

I quit working for Facilities (hallelujah!) and now I'm in the Spanish Department (EH 013) working as an assistant to Sivlia Sauter. I also just got a job at a new BBQ place behind Target called Famous Dave's. I'm going to be a server about four nights a week, if it ends up working out. They have some policies with which I take issue. Plus, I've been going to their mass orienations.

Now, I don't know if anyone has ever gone to a mass orientation before, but they are generally tedious and incredibly dull even with the most seasoned of trainers, because that is the nature of mass training. The trainers for my particular orientation group were...shitty. Very disorganized and unfocused, and just general time-wasters. That, combined with the fact that I have a lot to do and am usually tired, got on my last nerve, so I'm a bit irritated with Famous Dave's at the moment, but I'm sure things will perk up as soon as the initial boring crap is over.

So I heard a rumor it was finals week

2004-12-15T14:06:00.000-08:00

Man, I feel sorry for you losers who actually have tests this week. I don't actually have any "real" finals this semester (unless you count Spanish, which I don't.) So my grades all depend on work done during the semester. Despite that, I'm going to have the lowest GPA I've ever pulled this semester, because of a bullshit policy I like to call attendance points. (Mostly I like to call them that because that's what everyone else does.)

Here's what I think: if you can demonstrate a mastery of the concepts by, gee, getting all the points possible on tests and papers and things, then you shouldn't have to go to class. And I think it's filthy and abhorrent to expect people to attend a class in which they don't learn. I think it's filthy and abhorrent to make people attend a class anyway, because those who have a genuine interest in the class will show up whether you randomly assign attendance points or not, and those who don't probably won't pay attention anyway.

Down with attendance points! Let's pickett.

Finals

2004-12-09T08:28:00.000-08:00

It's usually around this time of year that I start that big push to finish the semester strong. This year, however, my "big push" is more like a half-hearted nudge.

Dilemma

2004-11-19T15:56:00.000-08:00

I'd like to go out tonight, but that would mean I'd probably have to shave my legs. So the question is this: is it worth it? Alison says no, my hairy legs and I should stay in and eat brownies on Friday night. Tempting alternative. We'll see.

yes

2004-11-11T17:43:00.000-08:00

The senate gave SHAPE a shit ton of funding today. Kick ass.

Recent World AIDS Day Developments

2004-11-11T17:10:00.000-08:00

So many things have been happening on the World AIDS Day front recently. We've taken so many steps forward in the planning or this project, and we're even starting to see solid results. Carol is going to order the flags on Monday, people have already committed to help with all the things that are going to require manpower, the documentary is in our hands, I talked to Ben Klien, the man with HIV who is going to speak on Tuesday, the red ribbons are ready for the ribbon campaign, and the list goes on. What has been accomplished far exceeds what still needs to be accomplished; and although that list itself is a long one, I feel confident that everything will get done on time, and that World AIDS Day will be a success.

I am less excited, however, about another recent development, one about which, it would seem, nothing positive can be said. It came to my attention today that, because of my efforts on the World AIDS Day project, some of the students in the SHAPE class assumed that I was HIV positive. These same students approached our faculty advisor and were apparently quite upset that I was in the class with them and infected with the disease. I think it's important to say here that they didn't just think I had HIV, they thought they knew I did, which means they were positive that I was infected and upset that I was in class with them.

At first I was incredibly angry and quite offended. I thought: how dare they make that assumption? I'm still pretty angry and pretty hurt, but at this moment, I'm mostly thinking how sad it is that they would automatically assume that because I care about HIV and AIDS, I must have it. I already knew that not all of the students in SHAPE are in SHAPE for the same reasons that I am, but I guess I assumed that they shared a similar mindset.

My first reaction was to make an announcement in class, and just tell everyone that I don't have HIV. My second reaction was not to tell them, to just let whoever these people are think that I am, in fact, infected. But what I am going to do is this, an idea I gleaned from the calm brain of Travis when I was so shocked I could barely articulate: I'm just going to tell some of my SHAPE friends the story of the anonymous members who were upset to "learn" that a student with HIV was in class with them. I think, because of the purpose and general spirit of the class, these students will start to feel like the ignorant assholes they are.

My first thought was of making a rousing speech in class, something to the effect of how ignorant it is to assume someone has HIV just because they care about preventing it. Maybe even say something about how as SHAPE members we are supposed to be educating people about HIV and AIDS, dispelling the myths, and getting past the stereotypes. But an attitude of superiority will do absolutely nothing. In fact, I'm not sure anything I do, or anything anyone does, will help whoever those students are to stop wallowing in ignorance and start actually listening to the message they're delivering when they do a presentation.

I'm just so...I can't even find a word to describe how I feel right now.

A big snowball. A big snowball of details.

2004-11-10T10:54:00.000-08:00

Last night I was so undefinably frustrated that I could do nothing to alleviate it, so I decided to go to bed. And here's what happened: I lay in bed (laid in bed? What IS the correct past tense form of that verb? Whatever.) staring at the ceiling and just thinking about all the things I wanted to do, which led me to thoughts of the things I needed to do, which led me to thinking about World AIDS Day. So I made a mental list of all the things I needed to accomplish today, and finally fell asleep at like three in the morning, after going to bed around 11.

This morning I wrote all the stuff down, and the list grew exponentially. Every time I wrote down one thing, I thought of two or three more that needed to be done! So I got to work, and of course I was frazzled because my mind was mostly occupied with a massive To Do list and the myriad other things on my brain were struggling for the remaining space. It took me twenty minutes to finish a two paragraph memo. Well, then I thought I would just make a few phone calls (just a few, mind you, to clear up some of the more pressing things on my list) and I discovered that once I got going, there was no stopping. Until, of course, my mind ceased to function completely, and has since been unable to form one coherent thought. So this is me, not working on anything for the time being. I was a whirling dirvish of detail-orientation, until I just shut down. It's like I ran out of gas or something. I was very productive (almost overproductive,) then *sputter, sputter,* death.

2004-11-05T16:10:00.000-08:00

The documentary we've been waiting on came in the mail today. I watched it instead of going to sociology, and it's only about half an hour. This presents a question: what do we do with only half an hour of film? We could screen the documentary, then have the speaker afterwards. The only thing is, the movie fits in really well with this year's focus on women, but the speaker is male. I'm trying to get ahold of him to see if he can tailor his message a little, but I'm not quite sure how to handle it. I don't want to sound like I'm not willing to listen to his usual message, or like it's not good enough for our presentation, but at the same time, I think it would be really great if we could sort of follow the global World AIDS Day theme.

And another thing is that I'm not really sure how relevant the movie is to the college crowd. I mean, it's good, but it follows three poor, urban women, and tells the story of how they contracted HIV and how they are dealing with it and their children, but it doesn't really address issues that would be facing college students. I know, it's probably impossible to find a movie about college-aged women dealing with HIV/AIDS, but I just want everything to be perfect so badly. Of course, nothing ever is, and I think what we've got is really great, I'm just worried that the continuity issue is going to dilute the importance of the message.

The Red Cross wants to cosponsor the flag campaign, but the head of the club hasn't been returning my emails or phone calls for two weeks, except once when he apologized for never getting back to me, but he still hasn't let me know how involved they want to be. Knowing that the Red Cross club wants to be involved, and that they need to cement their role in the campaign pretty soon, I blind-copied my most recent email to him to the clubs' sponsor. I think that was probably the right thing to do, but I'm not really sure. I don't see why it wouldn't be, but...I don't know, maybe I feel like I'm going over Brad's head or something. But, he never got back to me and it was impossible to get a concrete response from him. And I did give him two weeks, so...whatever.

Now we're thinking about t-shirts. But Carol said she doesn't want to just give t-shirts to all SHAPE members because she doesn't think they've really done anything towards the campaign that would make them deserve to get a free shirt. But I don't think we can give them to some people and not to others, because that might create tension. I could be worrying about an issue that's not really an issue, but with Sexual Responsibility Week coming up, everyone's going to need to be able to work together, and I don't want to throw even a tiny wrench in to the group. Still, I may defer on this one, because after all, it's just a shirt.

How's that for a misspelling?

2004-11-05T10:45:00.000-08:00

I thought I knew what I big pickle looked like, until I ordered Jimmy John's for lunch today. If pickles had races, this one would have been black. I mean, that was highly innapropriate! Who says that? No, but it was a really big pickle. The sandwich was ok, too, but it took a long time and I nearly wasted away of hunger. Then a bunch of people in the office got Jimmy John's envy, and eventually, it was sandwiches for everyone!

So my sandwich was tasty, and it made me very happy. I went down to drop something off at payroll and sang and danced my way down the stairs and then back up them again. Only someone saw me. Which was okay, because if you saw someone singing and dancing up a flight of stairs, wouldn't you be in a good mood for the rest of the day? So, I like to think it was a public service. Although, it probably would have been more funny if I had tripped or something. Seriously, was singing Fred Astaire and kind of half-waltzing in the stairwell, if I had tripped...priceless. Today my life is like musical theater. I may sing and dance my way up the stairs to sociology.

Fuck bureaucracy

2004-11-04T22:00:00.000-08:00

Once again the thing I set out to accomplish today has been postponed until some date in the unclear future which is yet to be determined. Redundancy, anyone? Dave and I set out to go on a ten, maybe fifteen minute excursion to diagnose the illness infecting my speakers, and we ended up driving and talking for around an hour and a half. So, my speakers are still ill, and I will try to cure them later.

The bill that went up before the student senate for World AIDS Day funding got differed today. It's not the end of the world, but I did spend two hours in a student senate session, which is probably the most ass-numbingly boring way a person could spend two hours, aside from watching grass grow. Actually, the grass would probably make some progress. That last thought may have been borne of frustration and therefore inaccurate, but the point is that I really wanted to know today if we'd get the money and we didn't. But, what can you do? We'll figure something out, and I'm sure everything will be fine.

If ever there were a day to have overactive sweat glands, this would not be a good one

2004-11-03T17:40:00.000-08:00

There's really nothing quite like sitting down after a long and hectic day. I think I forgot to do about as much as I actually did today, and I feel like a harried mother only I have no children. I spent most of my morning at the health fair, which was actually a lot of fun, except there may soon be a published photo of me with a dubious expression on my face, latex on my lips, and a condom in my hand. Someone always has a camera when I look most like an ass.

I changed my major today to public health/nutrition, which means I'm a bit behind, so I'll have to catch up and possibly spend an extra semester in college, but worse things could happen, so it's ok. I ran all around campus getting signatures and then I got the wrong form for a minor, and had to go fix that. So I was late to sociology class, but what's new? No attendance points today, of course. But someone did throw a fit in the middle of class and walk out, so that was fun and exciting. Then I was supposed to meet with my group to talk about health care, but only one other guy showed up so either we were in the wrong place or I don't really know what. So I went to the bunker to talk to Dave because I was driving by and saw his car, only he wasn't home, and I ended up chatting with JD and completely forgetting that I had a SHAPE presentation at Alpha Chi. I actually went home after talking to JD and was getting ready to take a nap when I suddenly remembered and sped my way over there, only to find out it had been rescheduled. But now I'm just sitting on the sofa, waiting for Alison to cook pasta because she has shunned my sauce, and listening to Alanis Morissette, who might be my new favorite.

Man, I love Moxie

2004-11-02T14:36:00.000-08:00

The most perfect ending to a questionable issue just happened to present itself to me in the form of an angel named Beth who works for Moxie Firecracker Films. She has said that she will let SHAPE screen the documentary "Hidden Crisis" at no charge except shipping and handling. We don't have to buy the rights, as long as we promise to only show it once and not try to pirate it out to any Tom, Dick, or Harry that wants a copy. I called her today, and she gave me the news, and I almost orgasmed because I was that excited.

I have been really concerned about the movie thing, becuase it meant that there was a questionable budget request to present to the student senate, and I really wasn't sure how they were going to handle that. But now I have accurate information to go in with, and I feel much better about things. I just can't even express the sheer greatness of this new development. Eloquence has completely failed me, as has my wit. It's just so...great.

Ginger Spice retires

2004-10-30T23:18:00.000-07:00

Actually, I had quite a good time on my jaunt to Lawrence this evening, despite coming back to Manhattan at 12:30. I had a really nice time at dinner with Alison's parents. They actually kick a whole bunch of ass, and are extremely interesting to talk to. Then we went to Borders and looked at books, which was also fun.

Ahaha...before we came back to Lawrence, we went to get coffee, so we wouldn't fall asleep in the car. I ordered a double, which was dumb. Everything was fine until right after the last rest stop on 70, and then I had to pee like a russian racehorse, and there was nowhere to stop for at least 25 miles. Alison and Kim thought it quite hysterical, but I was in an extreme amount of physical pain by the time I was finally able to get to a bathroom. Seriously, I almost couldn't walk. Lesson learned. Will never do that again.

Also found out on Friday that someone from SHAPE had put in a request for funding to the Student Governing Association ages ago, and then everyone had just forgotten about it, until Carol got word that we were supposed to pitch our request at a meeting on Sunday. So she asked Josh and I to do it, and I've been working on a budget to include an art exhibit we wanted to bring to campus called Faces of AIDS. I spent my Friday evening and Saturday afternoon furiously researching in order to present a mildly informed request to SGA, and then Carol e-mailed me tonight (I checked my email at the coffee shop, because I'm addicted to this project) and told me we couldn't get the exhibit, it isn't going to be available. So I've been rewriting the request to include the flag campaign and the movie. Hopefully, we'll get some SGA funding, and the money situation will be taken care of in one fell swoop. That would be so nice.

It's still morning and I'm having a fabulous day!

2004-10-28T08:40:00.000-07:00

Well, once again I'm excited to the point of peeing my pants about a new development regarding world AIDS day. May I just say that requesting things over the phone is much easier than in person? Especially with regards to the potential embarrasment factor stemming from my propensity to spill things on myself and therefore look like I just stepped out of a cafeteria foodfight. But that's not the point.

This is the point: while researching activities for World AIDS Day, I came across a documentay called Hidden Crisis: Women and HIV in America. Boy, was I pumped to find this. However, I was not pumped to find that the rights did not appear to be up for sale. So after many minutes on hold to various organizations this morning, I finally got ahold of the good folks at Moxie Firecracker Films, the makers of the documentary. It appears the rights are not actually up for sale to the general public, but they are willing to sell them on a case-by-case basis, and the woman I talked to said, and I quote, that she would "do all I can to get you this film."

Yes! I love that woman! I mean, I don't want to count my chickens before they hatch or anything, but I can't help but be extrememly excited! Of course, some of that might have to do with all the caffeine I've ingested this morning, but that's neither here nor there.

Problem? Solved!

2004-10-27T11:07:00.000-07:00

The Union Program Council was going to co-sponsor the movie, so long as it didn't interfere with their Domestic Violence symposium (they're having Dave Peltzer speak) which presented a problem. Problem no more. As it turns out, there will be a speaker for World AIDS Day in a different location (which will be announced in a future blog, as well as all over campus as soon as everything is figured out.) So, if we can get Forum Hall for Tuesday, we can show the movie Tuesday, and possibly have a short presentation beforehand. I found out there is a group called Misfits based out of Topeka, that is made up of people who are living with or directly affected by HIV and AIDS. And one guy is a speaker, so I'm going to see if he can come on Tuesday. I also found this documentary called Hidden Crisis: Women and HIV in America, which fits in perfectly with this year's theme. The only thing is that it is fairly new, so buying the rights to show it might be a little on the pricey side.

Oh! Free ribbon from Lafene! They just had red ribbon chilling in a closet somewhere and they heard we could use it, so we definetely have about 30 yards or red ribbon that can be safety pinned for very little extra cost. Also, I found out that SHAPE already has one World AIDS Day banner, so there's another thing we don't need to buy. Fabulous news today. Fabulous!

What else...oh, this: we're going to do a poster campaing in the res halls, and I discovered that SHAPE doesn't even have to post the signs! All we have to do is take them to the Pittman Building, get the "This posting has been approved by KSU Housing and Dining" stamp, give them to the res halls, and the RAs will hang them. Pretty cool. I have to say that for my first effort at organizing an event, things seem to be working out pretty smoothly. Cross your fingers that it stays that way.

Helm territory: slightly intimidating, but definitely exciting

2004-10-25T13:47:00.000-07:00

Today I found myself (as I have so many other days) with my mind not on the task at hand, but rather on World AIDS Day, which has recently become my pet project. The organization through which I am officially working, SHAPE, has limited resources financially, and, I'm beginning to suspect, in regards to manpower as well, so I have been feeling out other groups on campus to discuss possible collaboration. While I was embroiled in my search for funding and pairs of hands today, a thought occured to me: am I asumming a responsibility that is not entirely my own? After all, I'm a newbie, and SHAPE has done World AIDS Day before, so there was a distinct possibility that I was stepping on someone's toes by delving head-first in to this project. I called my SHAPE sponsor, Carol, and she informed me that I was most certainly "the man." So I resumed my search with fervor.

I had already arranged for the Red Cross Club to help out, because Brad the Red Cross Guy (whose last name I don't know) is not only president of the Red Cross Club, but also a SHAPE member, and the Red Cross Club had designs on World AIDS Day as well, so we've decided to go in together on some awareness activities. Also, the Union Program Council had expressed their willingness to aid SHAPE in purchasing the rights to show "Philadelphia" in Forum Hall, which was also a big help. Then, today, some correspondence I had sent out regarding the project was replied to, and it seems that the Campaign for Nonviolence, ACTION, and the Women's Center (this years global theme is Women, Girls, HIV, and AIDS) are all willing to lend whatever support they can to the project. I am so excited about this I can barely contain myself.

There are definetely several activities in the planning stages. There has been a significant amount of interest in doing a flag campaign in the quad, using red flags to represent AIDS victims, and also in putting up signs around campus (much like those damn things up now urging everyone to donate money to the university), we will probably be selling red ribbons, most certainly will be handing out condoms (after all, isn't that what SHAPE is known for?), and I don't know what else, but if anyone has a good idea, feel free to bounce it off of me (and my fabulous breasts) and I'll see what can be done about it. The only thing with the flag campaign is that the sheer number of AIDS victims is staggering, and a using one flag for each person would require immense amounts of manpower as well as ground space. But the message would be oh so powerful. Anyway, these things must be worked out, and more research must be done, so let's just hope everything ends up working out well and I can put on some sort of program deserving of the day.

Mo? Call me Pinko!

2004-10-24T14:24:00.000-07:00

Walter: "Don't talk about that with Mo, she'll fill you with her liberal pinko ideas."

Pinko: n. Emotionally charged term used to refer to extreme radicals or revolutionaries.
Liberal: a. Not limited to or by established, traditional, orthodox, or authoritarian attitudes, views, or dogma.

I thought it was an insult, until I looked in to what it really meant. So if you look at it from the perspective of a right-wing old catholic fart, it's actually quite a compliment. Thanks, dad!

Yummy

2004-10-23T06:22:00.000-07:00

If I didn't feel like vomiting my eyes out after eating an entire pound of Taco Bell burrito at two this morning, I sure as shit do now. I just went to the bathroom, blithely intending to do my business, and I glance at the counter, and there is a dead fish just chilling in between the sinks. Wrong. So fucking wrong. Excuse me.

Once again, ambiguity breeds difficulty. And I'm a fucking moron.

2004-10-22T08:51:00.000-07:00

I've just been handed part of the manuscript for my boss's as yet unfinished science fiction-ish novel, which she would like me to read and then provide some 'constructive criticism.' I'm a little uncomfortable with this. Yesterday, when she asked me, my response was the less-than-clear "Oh, umm, well, I think I'm really busy today..." which, I thought, would impart the message that I didn't really want to criticize my boss's pet project, constructively or otherwise. That's what I get for making assumptions.

A few short moments ago, I was handed a copy of said manuscript "in case I have time this weekend." I. Am. An. Idiot. I should have just said "oh, I don't think that's such a good idea." But now I've already got it, so now I'm going to read it. And then I'm just going to say I think it's great and leave it at that. I'm midly peeved at myself right now, and midly peeved at my boss, so I'm blogging at work in mild retaliation.

ah, glorious enlightenment!

2004-10-20T13:37:00.000-07:00

So I'm checking my email today (and here's where I tell you the first paragraph of this blog has nothing to do with the subject, which I will get to next) and I sign in with my name and password, and get my email, but then I try to compose, and my signature, strangely enough, is that of my roommate. So I open my adress book, just to see what's up, and it's HER adress book. WTF?

Now, we get to the meat of this blog. I've been having quite the introspective day, and was on quite a roll until I left for sociology, a class which I usually find to be pretty worthless. Well, we've been doing group presentations on social problems for a while now, and today's presentation was on drugs and alcohol. Now, my basic feeling is that at least pot should be legal. But that's not the point. The point is, this topic led to a rousing debate within the class and it was amazing! I have never enjoyed a sociology period more in my entire career as a sociology student, which admittedly has been quite short, but that does not negate the sheer greatness of todays class.

I am usually pretty vocal in sociology (partly because I sit up front and partly because I have this crazy idea that some people give a shit what I think) and so my instructor asked my opinion on the legalization of marijuana, or at least the decriminalization thereof. And I said pot smokers aren't hurting anybody, just legalize it, the government would love all the money they'd make on taxes! So some random joe in the back, who I think assumed I smoke pot because of my previous comment, says "the government exists to protect you, even from yourself." I was like, waaa? I'm pretty sure the government hasn't even MET me, let alone knows me well enough to 'protect me from myself.' Well, there was that time I shagged a senators son, but that doesn't count. Actually, that didn't even happen, but it makes for a funny interjection, doesn't it?

I forgot to say earlier that I had a ridiculously inapropriate msn discussion at work today, and it was delightful.

did you find it yet?

2004-10-20T10:59:00.000-07:00

Congratulations, Travis! (Unfortunately, I can't offer you a tangible prize, but isn't being allowed to access the forum for my thoughts reward enough?)